What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

You idiot thats 9 letters

Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Is your daddy a thief? Because he stole my wallet.

Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him? Because that would be assault, and not only assault but aggravated assault, since you are using a weapon to do it. Plus, the lawyer would have an advantage over you in court during the trial, due to having a law degree.

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

Why did the fat boy cry? His grandmother died

What did little Jimmy get for Christmas? Presents because he wasn't poor.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

Q: What did the teacher say at the end of recess. A: "Recess is over."

Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

"Knock Knock" "Come in"

Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

Ey hornboy give es a SCAB

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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