zx

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what has four wheels and opens using a key? -a trunk on wheels

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Why does history repeat itself? Because no one listened to it the first time.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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Why was the dog hairless? I lied, it was a pig.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Who is worse than Adolf Hitler? Lebron James

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It's about 3 days from Mother's Day. What do you get her? Nothing. Nothing is a very powerful thing. hehe thats what she said.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Oooh a cloud

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What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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What do you call a dog with 3 legs? Just because it has 3 legs dosnt mean you have to call it anything different

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

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A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

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Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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