what happend when the AntiJoke Crossed the road? It pooped in the ... HIT BY A REFRIGERATOR.

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Justin Bieber

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What's white and sticky? A marshmellow.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at the piano? Because he is dead.

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Philosoraptor, turds IM A SPAMBOTz B=Not really, just blind.

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What do Jews and Sloths have in common? They are both Mammals.

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Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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What do you call a black man walking on the side of a road? A Pedestrian

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Leo! Leo get over here before i abuse you. Okay, im going to my whip.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

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What do you call a dead cow? Dead Meat.

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THE GAME

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roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

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How did the ball fall from the cup? It didn't, it happened to be tied to a string attached to the cup.

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what do you call a baby rapest jordan gregg

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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Why would it matter if they believed such a thing? Are you trying to screw me over? You know that I am very competent at making myself seem like a total jackass myself right? You got a point, it is not my role to help others in life, I just guess I enjoy repairing others, it sure is a hell lot easier than repairing myself, I just enjoy repairing things I can repair I suppose, now using them as my henchmen that's just worthless. The way I see it, people that wage wars, control others, indoctrinate them, and/or accumulate great sums of wealth to the point where, well its pointless, are all just overcompensating, trying to make up for something that they cannot repair within themselves. It is only natural, I mean we humans, if we lack something, we get a lot more of something else. Thanks, you are right about that whole "soul incident" as I call it, it is strange how people often seem to know each other a lot better than they know themselves, I mean I could at any time choose to quit, to become like others, to surrender my individuality, to "give up my soul" or rather the essence of what makes us unique. But you know, ill rather die than live as a servant for a society many would say I never truly learned to understand. Truth is, I will never accept it, if true strength stops arriving from within, its because people choose to seek it from others, the day I require the approval of others in order to sustain myself, ill off myself, that's not a real definition of existence as far as my opinion goes. I mean what are we worth to ourselves, if we become beings that base our so called value on what others think about us? We should focus on becoming those that spread joy and inspire others, rather than to seek inspiration and joy from others. Why? Because its a win win scenario, you cannot spread joy if you got none, you cannot inspire others if we have no inspiration, I guess you can fake it, sometimes until it becomes real, but that is mental-ism and not ideology (not that they are complete opposites, and if they are not opposites, they can work as a synergy) I guess I had forgotten about that, tell yourself that you are great enough, and you become great, excuse me, I am dead tired, its been hours, say, how are you doing?

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Knock, knock ... ... No one answers the door because knocks produce a quieter sound than a doorbell and the residents of the house are upstairs watching a movie.

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sally was hit by a bus and lost both arms knock knock who's there? not sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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