how do you make a plumber cry kill his family LOLOLOLOLOLOL

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A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

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Why was the little boy's hair messed up on picture day? Because he was brutally stabbed in the face.

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What did the boy say to his friend? "Hello!"

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why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

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An atheist dies and so will we all, eventually.

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what do jason kidd and michael jackson have in common? they are both actually black

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

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You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

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What made your girlfriend laugh to death? You dropped my pants.

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

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what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it didn't the hunter shot it

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. The man apologizes, and the bra assures him not to worry. They both continue on their way. The man wonders what a bra is doing walking around unattached to a woman, especially this late at night.

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What mother loved her son so much, she gave him a scar on his forehead for it? Lily Potter.

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A girl falls out of a tree. She got hit by a flying pig.

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

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Roses are red Violets are blue life is a bitch and so are you

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Roses are red Violets are blue My body is ready I want you

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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