What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A woman catches her husband cheating on her she divorces him in a rather lengthy sequence of meetings in court

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If only i were a man! You not! Your a.... WO-MAN!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the man fall over? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the homosexual community have last night? A protest for gay rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

thumb_up thumb_down -8

1,2,3,4,5... 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There was a horse in a very hot sumer day. He was in the middle of corn field It was so hot that the corns started popping out. The horse thought it was snowing and died of cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the man order a mail order Asian bride? Because he was caucasian which meant females of his race had unrealistically high expectations of a partner due to various materialistic overtones that are constantly portrayed in their medie creating a society of over entitled women who think they are owed the earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An under aged man walks into a bar. the bar tender forgets to ask for his ID and gives him a beer. That man was later fired.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops