A man goes to the store to buy a kitten. While there, he decides to buy two because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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Why did America nuke Japan? Because Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

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How many girls does ittake to screw in a lightbulb? Doesnt matter as long as dinner is on the table by 6:00

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Jake. Walsh.

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What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

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a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

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Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

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What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

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A muslim and a jew meet each other in a dark ally...... they give each other strange looks because they are both in a dark ally.

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jamie is a noob jamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noob

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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A guy walks into a restaurant.... He ordered his meal , got desert and left a nice tip based off a percentage of his final bill.

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Q;How many screams does it take to ruin a good riddle? A: OOOOOONNNNEEEEEEEEEEE! Moral: This potentially awesome riddle may or may not have been aborted by a scream.

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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What do you call a Mexican who likes to eat burritos? A Mexican

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Why did the man scream? because he was run over.

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What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

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roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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