What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

Why didn't the cat have any legs? Because it was a snake

Women's rights.

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

Trouble with the trolley, eh? No

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

where do some birds live in? Earth

Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she didn't have any arms

Oh you expected a funny joke? Oh well

what's mouthwatering and smells like fish? salmon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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