What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

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What happened to the convict on death row? He died

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men jump out, and the plane crashes anyway.

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What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

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What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican is human being, and has no simalarities to an average day wooden bench.

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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A special needs student walks into a girls change room, and is then escorted out unaware that what he did was socially unacceptable.

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What did the woman get for Christmas? Cooking oil and a black eye.

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What do you call a black man with no legs? Crippled.

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Why did the plane crash? Because there was no pilot

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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do you currently smoke? i hope not.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

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butt sex

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pudding

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Smeg...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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