Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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why does one side of a v-flock of geese have more birds? Because it does.

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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chuck norris

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Knock Know! Come in!

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Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

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Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

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Poop swing

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his coat? Where's my coat.

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

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My dad said that if I post anymore jokes on this website, the will hit my head against the keyboaaskdnaji;nsd;asdnasd;

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Why is a man like a packet of cards? Both are organic.

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Women's Rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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