Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

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Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to rape him.

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

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What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

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Dylan Eichas

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what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

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A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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