Vagina.

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What happened to the seal that walked into the zoo? Well nothing because seals can't walk.

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The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

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Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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A black man, an Asian man, and an American man are in a car. Who is driving? The black man, it's his car.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? None, for the task at hand is so simple, you should do it.

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What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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Yo mama so fat, her wand is a Slim Jim

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Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

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Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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Why did the Korean shoot the dog? Unfortunately, the dog was suffering from a severe mental trauma it had sustained when it by got hit by a car. This caused the dog to be extremely aggressive and it ruthlessly attacked a 5-year old girl playing in the street. The Korean who was coming home from a day out hunting in the woods saw the girl and shot the dog from long range to save the girl's life. The man was later thanked by the girl's family.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops