I'm at my grandmothers house right now

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what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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Why did Hunter cross the road? No one cares, unless he gets hit.

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What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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who is awesome? no one...

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A doctor rides in his Mercedes Benz through a rough, poor part of town. He sees a homeless person who is begging for money. The doctor stops and gets out of his car and asks "Ill give you some money if you need it for food". The homeless person then shoots and kills the doctor, takes his wallet, and buys crack.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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Two black guys jump off a bridge..who lands first? They would land at the same time due to earths gravity acting on them both with an equal force.

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Okay, after this one then...

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

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What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

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Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

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If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

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knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

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Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

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Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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