"It's a blimp, it's a hot air balloon!" "No wait, it's your mom."

Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

i am blue you are red ive got a face look at it look at it i say

Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

We have come to the United States in search of a just, and profitable land, but we have found a place of bigots and racists.

How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

A racist walks into a bar. Nasty accident you had there mate. You should be more careful next time.

Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

The other day, a buddy of mine gave me some of his sandwich. "My wife made it," he said. "It's really good," I answered. We chewed in silence after that.

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

hickory dickory dock no one cares

What did the black man say to his wife? Nothing, she had died earlier that year after a long battle with cancer.

How are humans like slinkies? - They are not good for very much and bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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