Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

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Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

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What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

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minorities

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Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

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what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

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You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

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What do Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Pamela Anderson all have in common? All of their last names end with an "n"

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Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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