Why did Mary fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Who pushed johnny of the cliff? Certainly not Mary

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cause he was a chicken.

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why do I hate food? I don't.

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

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what's worse than than finding a worm up your ass? Death

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Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

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Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

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1,2,3,4,5... 6.

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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Why did the man order a mail order Asian bride? Because he was caucasian which meant females of his race had unrealistically high expectations of a partner due to various materialistic overtones that are constantly portrayed in their medie creating a society of over entitled women who think they are owed the earth.

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

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Whats the difference between babies and a dart board? Dart boards dont bleed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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