Did you hear about the new German oven? Seats 40.

What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

chuck norris

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

what is the difference between the black orphan and the white orphan.... the black orphan died after i raped it

Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

Why did the doctor commit suicide? His wife was recently killed in a car accident and simply could not take the emotional pain!

Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

like most people my age. im 27

I'm a champion. I do what I want.

Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

how did the girl die? she read all of your terrible anti-jokes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...