A black man has 100 problems. on his AP calculus test.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

thumb_up thumb_down

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

thumb_up thumb_down

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down

There once was a woman from Ealing, Who had a peculiar feeling She went to the doctors and was consequently diagnosed with Chlamydia

thumb_up thumb_down

I was chatting to a woman in a bar, when the subject of kids came up. I said, "My son has had to wear nappies for his entire life." "That's awful," she said, "what's wrong with him?" I replied, "Nothing. He's two and a half."

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you get a one armed polock out of a tree? You assess the situation and get a ladder the proper size to reach him, making sure the ladder is stable.

thumb_up thumb_down

Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

thumb_up thumb_down

Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Violets are blue These two lines are overused I wonder to what poem they originally come from

thumb_up thumb_down

A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the difference between my right hand and my left hand? I used my right hand to stab your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

thumb_up thumb_down

Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down

What do and Asian and an orange have in common? They are both complex, carbon based life forms living on the only world in the universe known to harbor life.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

thumb_up thumb_down

Female Orgasms

thumb_up thumb_down

Where did Susie go when her town was bombed? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

thumb_up thumb_down

Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops