whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you do when a red gorilla comes running at you with 7 dominoes in his hand Ask him to stop

thumb_up thumb_down -10

This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you cross a cat with a fish? A dead fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

On the 1st day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . Windows 95 for my PC On the 2nd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 3rd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 4th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 5th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 7th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 8th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 9th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 9 apps a crashin' 8 megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 10th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 11th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 12 illegal operations 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

thumb_up thumb_down -10

That moment when the best part of your life is when you get 50 friends on Facebook....

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The day the forces of light fight the forces of darkness, we will all live in darkness no matter who wins. Pure darkness will not allow you to see. Pure light will blind you.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the worst place to land when parachuting off an airplane? A. In the middle of an ocean B. In a war zone C. Inside an active volcano D. In a justin beiber concert

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats wooden and hard a wooden floor

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a blonde walks into a drycleaning store to get her clothes and on her way out the empoyee behind her says come again and then the blonde says shut up u nosy bitch its just toothpaste this time!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops