Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

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What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

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why did the chicken go to the man? TO ask if he wants sex for money

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Your pathetic humanity. Deux. Dios Gud God etc. Moral: You cannot even translate the name of his very being correctly, and you expect the bible to be translated right... Laught now, because I shall silence you soon enough...

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three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

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What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

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"You can't get past" "I'll get future" dad cri mom cri boy bang girl girl cri women's rites sholdnt exist.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob. What do you call a man with no arms or legs in front of your door? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms or legs hanging on your wall? Art.

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I just found out i have cancer.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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The bears will win the Super Bowl

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What's heed and has wheels? Your mom.

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Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

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your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops