My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple

Im cute hehehee

Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

What do you call a person from China? Chinese, duh.

Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

Why did Bob fall over? He was impaled by a narwhal. -BG

OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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