why did the kid drop his sandwich? his hand was cut off

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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Hi

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

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A man makes a sandwich.

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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The more I learn to understand myself, the more true I am towards my values the less human I feel. The irony is, that there will always be other humans feelng the same.

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Whats funnier than a black guy dieing? Everything thats not funny

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Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

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some of the people who write thes jokes are complete assholes

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Q:Why are babies and spaghetti alike? A:They both stick to the wall when cooked.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no hands. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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