Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

So um think of two things. Oh wait backspace that. What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Ok answer. Ok stop no seriously so. Enter. Ok Enter. Q backspace A nope Chuck Testa

Why couldn't the ten-year-old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

Why couldnt the girl ride her bike? becuase she was dreaming she actually doesnt have a bike her family is poor in these hard economic times.

What did the mute say to the deaf man?

What did the blue man say to the red lady? Do you want to make purple? -A.M.M

Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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