roses are red violets are blue grass is green

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*Click* "Hello you have reached a pre-recorded voice at the suicide hotline. We regret to inform you that our consultant has suffered a recent bout of depression due to the sheer volume of calls he has received." "His body was found this morning, hanging from a tree." [L]

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Moral

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

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> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

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Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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whats worse then finding a worn in your apple the holocaust whats worse then the holocaust two worms in your apple

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A man and his dog walk into the park, the man grabs a ball and chucks it for the dog. The dog can not chase after the ball because he has no legs and bites his owners leg.

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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how did the man die from falling out of the window his angry x- friend pushed him.

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

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Why couldn't the rich dumbass get into colledge? He couldn't open the door

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Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

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What do you call Mary in a wheelchair ... virgin mobile

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops