Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

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Finn Davidson is cool, no he's not, yes he is

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

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An Amish man walks into a bar. He then orders a non-alcoholic beverage due to the temperance practices of the Amish faith.

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(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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Knock, knock. Door opened.

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Q: What's worse? Inhaling fly spray or deodorant? A: The Holocaust

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What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

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whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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