A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? -A pilot

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

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A white man, a black man, and a mexican are stranded on an island. They all died.

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Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

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So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

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a man walked into a bar....

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Roses are red. Violets are red. I have a gun. What did i do?

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all jokes aside...

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knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

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Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

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There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

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Jason's Wife said to him I love you before I left to head to work, Jason then went back inside to see no one was there and he remembered his wife died in 2009.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

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Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

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A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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