Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

You know whats better than 24? 25

Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

what is funnier then this joke? A jewish muslim that is asian, balck, and mexican,and is woomen crossing the border then geting shot and hung by a rope of dead babies

Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A new born baby is left alone in his crib after a long day of playing, He gets taken out of his crib for his first meal with his grandparents, he is excited, His grandparents come in and after the usual praising of the child they sit down for dinner, They are having chicken, His mother puts the spoon to his mouth, He chews it and swallows it, It gets stuck in his throat and he suffocates and dies.

Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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