Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -19

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

You're Mother's so fat, she sat on a chair, and it broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Jesus sacrificed his life to prove that he was immortal. So where does the part where he gets nailed to a stick and beaten the shit out of fit in?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

roses are red, violets are blue, tom cruise is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -19

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Once a upon a time there were three kittens that die, the end :D

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the black man jump higher than the white man he was on a trampoline

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Kyle grund parker coffey

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Jeffrey's a nigger A refrigerator is white But Jeffrey's not a refrigerator. He's a nigger.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why didnt Joe drive the tractor today? Because Joe doesnt have any arms or legs. Why doesnt Joe have any arms or legs? A) Because Joe is a potatoe

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops