Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

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Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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learn. advance!

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Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

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*Knock knock* I thought no one was home so I left... Turns out my grandma hung herself

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what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

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baloney sandwich

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? She was dead

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There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

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how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

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A man walks into a bar. The barman says, 'why the lo-, wait, i thought you was that horse again.'

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Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

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What's worse than HIV? AIDS -Bob Bobby

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roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

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Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

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Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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