a man in a black van pulls up to a kids house and offers him icecream the kid points out that since it is summer and black absorbs heat, that the icecream will have melted

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

thumb_up thumb_down -6

You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the fat man fall off the swing? Because he weighed 855 pounds and it broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man, a Muslim man, and a Jewish man walk into a bar so the bartender says, "Get the f*** out."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops