Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

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How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "I was born with an extra chromosome."

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How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

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Why did Kelly lose all interest in men? An aneurysm in her brain popped

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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Women's Rights.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

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copy me and i will kill you

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What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

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What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

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I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

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69 is a number not a sex poshion

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops