A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

what do you call a man with no friends? it's because of all the wear and tear that's done to the socks being thrown in her, and she desanitizes only the nun with no forebeard

What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It followed a trail of bird feed that was strewn across the street.

Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

What did Grandma give little Ben for Christmas? a wheelchair

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

JOSH BROWN STOP ADDING PEOPLES NAMES TO THE END OF YOUR TRUE STORIES!

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Your mom is so old, I am surprised she can still own a house and function on her own.

There is a wire, Let's put it on fire, The fire spread so did your legs, Now were both lying dead on your bed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

Why did the girl fall down the stairs? Because her asshole brother pushed her :)

Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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