An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

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Black...

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Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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What the person say to the other Person? Hi.

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You're mother is so retarded that I probably shouldn't be making fun of her because it would be considered discriminatory.

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's blind.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

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Last night, I went fishing, caught a fish, brought it home, grilled it, ate it, and went to bed.

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Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

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Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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Jake. Walsh.

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Yo mama so fat when she sat around the hous she sat AROUND the house

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I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

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Why did the man break all his bones? Because his parachute failed to open

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Why didn't the family finish their picnic? Because a dog was sick all over the food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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