What do you call a poldo thats hafl poldo a

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did the Dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What does a scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!!

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your mom is so stupid she got raped

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

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Sally walked into a bar and asked for a drink. Because she was under 21 they denied her request,

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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Why do people like vacations? To get out of your family

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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knock knock come in!

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why'd my house get destroyed I was afraid the tornado that hit mass was going to destroy it so I blew it up

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Yo mama is so ugly that the devil warships her.

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Erron, who the hell do you work for? I thought we where friends, allies! We have not done anything illegal ever!

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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Q. What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A. An horse.

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Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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*Brother comes downstairs wet and naked* Mom: Did you enjoy your shower?

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whats green and dont fit? a dead epileptic.

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Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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What happens when you drive down the road? you get to the end of the road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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