Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

A elephant drowns when it was swimming, why did this happen? Who cares its already dead!

What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cause he was a chicken.

Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

What did the Jewish man say when he answered the phone? Hello?

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

Why was the homosexual sad? Because his parents kicked him out, it was illegal for him to be married, and he had a difficult time being accepted by the society into which he was born.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

so today i took a poop. hehe

Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

How many people live in China? At least ten.

What page are you on The gay page.

what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

Yo mamas so ugly that when she went to an ugly contest the host said "sorry no Professionals"

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

It says so on your cap.

Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

knock knock who's there? orange orange who? orang you glad i didn't say knock knock agian

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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