If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

A man walks into a bar. He suffered concussions later that night.

Q:Whats funnier than 24? A: 25.

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

Why is Obama black Because his parents were black

wanna here a good joke? me too.

What did one homo-sexual say to his four homo-sexual friends? Were One Direction!!

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears Because he's a rabbit

Man U

cats are pussies

What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

look under under where under under where. under the couch

why did the women cross the road? she didnt, theres no road in the kitchen.

So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the gas man, I've come to read your meter, like we arranged.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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