what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

People spending hours typing nothing but cus words? Who does that?

What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

How does Cee Lo Green order extra ketchup? Can I have some more ketchup, please?

What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt, its just a myth

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

What do you call an Asian man in a car? A motorist.

What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

How did the blonde die? Frogs teleported from the future and brutally murdered her with forks.

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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