Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

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what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

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why is 6 scared of 7 because 7 is scary...

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What happens when you drop a baby? It falls.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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Whats worse than 4 dead babies in a bucket? finding an actual joke on Anti Joke.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am couler-blind, and poetry is gay

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What is white and long? A New York winter

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Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

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Why din't Santa come to Timmy's house? Timmy died 6 months ago. :(

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John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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Q: How do you call a group of animals? A: Llama.

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Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

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jim is constantly asking bob the same questions, bob brings this to attention and suggests that jim might have amnesia. jim agrees and they move on iwth the conversation. minutes later jim asks a simaler question brought to attention earlier because he has amnesia

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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How do you stop an oncoming bus? You push a stroller in front of it.

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What happened to him after he died? He got buried.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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