So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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What did one manicotti say to the other manicotti? I doubt we'll ever know.

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what did the kid with poleo get for christmas. whatever he has on his christmas list because his parents feel bad for passing down the genetic information(DNA) that gave him poleo.

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what do you call a black man in a police car? either officer or offender, depending on what role he has in the crime.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

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Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

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Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

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anti-joke.com

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say cheese

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

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Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

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What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

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A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

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What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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