Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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1,2,3,4,5... 6.

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Why did the man order a mail order Asian bride? Because he was caucasian which meant females of his race had unrealistically high expectations of a partner due to various materialistic overtones that are constantly portrayed in their medie creating a society of over entitled women who think they are owed the earth.

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why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

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What did Geoar Bush say after a journalist ask what he was going to do about Katrina? Where gonna find her we do think she has some connection with Alkida .

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An under aged man walks into a bar. the bar tender forgets to ask for his ID and gives him a beer. That man was later fired.

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Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

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a woman votes!

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

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What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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