Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

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What is white, black and blue all over? A zebra that was assaulted by Chuck Norris.

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What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

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Q: what is an anti-joke? A: Coffee Volvos

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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what did the radish say to the orange i'm a radish

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your mom is so stupid she has a low iq

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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Amazing

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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Yo mamma is so fat her blood type is RAGU

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What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

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1d

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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