What's a word that describes someone annoying, black, starts with an N and ends with a R? Nagger

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What do you call a tortilla from venezuela? A tortilla.

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Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

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What's a fat chinaman? A guy who somehow got obese on rice. HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!

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how do u talk to a person you like go up and talk to them

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What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that if she sat on me, she would crush my skull and kill me.

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What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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Koalas mum is a slut

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what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

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You will not press the like button.

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

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What do you say to a horse at the vet? Good god, look at that ear infection.

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What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

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Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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So this farmer had theses two amazingly fast horses, one named slokey and the other pokey. They would run in the pasture and bring many people to watch. So one day this man says hey, you should enter them in the county derby. So he does and the whole race its slokey, pokey slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. So after the farmer collects his prize money a man walks up and says, hey those horses are pretty fast, you should enter them in the state derby. So he loads his horses up to the capital and prepares them. When the gates open slokey and pokey dash out of the gate. The whole race its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After all the press conferences a man says, hey you should enter those horses in the kentucky derby. So the farmer enters them and drives down to kentucky. The gates open and the whole time its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After the press meetings a man says hey you should enter your horses in the european derby. The farmer says no, im going to retire my horses. One fall afternoon pokey says to slokey, man, i wish i could have won a single race. So they race around the huge pasture and the whole way its slokey, pokey, slokey pokey, and pokey wins by a nose! All the farm animals go crazy and the farm dog says "congratulations pokey you finally won!" And pokey says "HOLY SHIT A TALKING DOG!"

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Q. Why did the boy throw up on the bus? A. All his friends around him died in the accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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