What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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i like my babies how i like my potatoes..... skinned

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How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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whats the difference between Obama and Romney answer: one would have been a good president instead of a communist

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What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Not having an apple, reguardless of its inhabitants.

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

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Q: What happened when the Mexican went to the doctors? A: He was diagnosed with depression.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, they already stole them all.

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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Roses are red Violents are blue Oranges

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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