What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

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The day the forces of light fight the forces of darkness, we will all live in darkness no matter who wins. Pure darkness will not allow you to see. Pure light will blind you.

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dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

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What did the cow say to the farmer? moo

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Whats bigger than a tree A bigger tree

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hola said the chinese man

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LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

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An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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Why did the girl fall out of the tree? Because she had no arms

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what happens every day? People die

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

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Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops