A christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walked into a bar... Then the Muslim shoots the Jew and blows himself up.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

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My arms get tired from carrying my big diick everywhere, well at least it's better than dragging it

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Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

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Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

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A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

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Whats a welfare? Its what keeps you alive.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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hi joshua

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Why don't you throw a rock at a Mexican on a bike? Because depending on the size of the rock, you could seriously injure him.

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A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

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April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

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I drive a 'rarri

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Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops