Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Whats worse than burnt toast? Getting molested

Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind.

why did the US nuke japan besause sending chuck norris would be to cruel

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Harry Chappell raped someone

The only thing you need to call a woman that starts with "B" is "Beautiful" Biitches love to be called beautiful

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

An asian and a black guy walked into a bar. An ambulance rushed to their aid as they were in great pain and had a slight chance of becoming paraplegic.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

Why was the kid hungry? Because he lived in Africa.

I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

Banana Hamock.

I'm 4 and what is this?

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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