What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

A man walked into a lampost. He hurt himself.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

How do you kill a blonde? There are countless ways to complete such a task all of which have infinite variations.

a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

What did Little Jojo get for Hanukah? Nothing he is Muslim.

Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

What do you get when you cross a surfer and a black man? An angry surfer and an angry black man. You really should be nicer to people.

a Polar bear in an Igloo.

What do you call a black man on steroids? Strong.

How come Kristin cant go play soccer anymore? She broke her leg kicking her brother in the face.

How do you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? You find someone you trust and say "an elephant has been in my refrigerator".

A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

What did the guy say to the mushroom? You're a fungi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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