Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is 1 inch long and eats everyone in it's way .... my pet fish

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I just found out i have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

You know whats better than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How old are you? 7

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

thumb_up thumb_down -27

hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Neglegence and irresponsibility of a farmer.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

dead dibbs

thumb_up thumb_down -29

The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops