I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

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What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

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What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

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your sister has 1 boob thats funny

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he had ice cream.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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69

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Two black guys jump off a bridge..who lands first? They would land at the same time due to earths gravity acting on them both with an equal force.

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What's Blue and tastes like orange cake? A blue cake.

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The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it made no sense

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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What is green and looks like a blue car? A Green car

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What did little jonny do when he broke his leg? He proceeded to brake into tears due to the excruciating pain caused by his unfortunate injury.

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what do you call justin bieber having sex baby baby baby oh

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A man wakes up in the hospital after being in a car accident. He begins to yell "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor hurries into the room to find out why the patient is yelling. The doctor then promptly explains that this was due to the crash severing his spinal cord and rendering him paraplegic for the rest of his life. The doctor after explaining this states he'll never walk again, before leaving the patient's room.

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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Wanna hear a story bout my uncle turza.... My uncle turza was eating fruit loops one day and there was a squirrel in the trre from 2 days ago he got angry because the spoon was from the phillipines so he punched a whole in the wall and his half uncle cousins sister had a cage.... True story

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

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a young cow was sitting on a bench until her husband shot her after that he said to the farmer 'i will get the milk than you cut the udders and then maranade them

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On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

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Why didn't the blonde finish her book? She died.

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Ted: Joe, do you think I'm dumb? Joe: No, I think you're Ted.

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Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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