What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

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Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir......my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Your mama's so nice, she made me cookies once. And I enjoyed them.

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

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British Dentistry

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I did not thumb this up myself!... *click* Whoops! At least I am not that douche Moral Man eh? Moral: Whoops! Now if I just don't accidentally type in the answer and...

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What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

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ajkswhfuilafhgkfdgbluft

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What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

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Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

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What did the black guy do with his gun? Shoot a deer

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't, you're either just racist or unobservant.

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Why am I righting in english? Because this is an english site.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

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What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops