Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call an asian woman with one leg? By her name.

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It escaped the zoo.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

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Why are black people so tall? Because their parents were

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

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Person 1: 'Ask me if I'm a tree' Person 2: 'Are you a tree?' Person 1: 'No.'

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Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

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Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops