A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

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why didnt the llama eat the string bean? Becuz he was a vegetarian

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What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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I was gonna make a joke about a my dick... Racecar

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a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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On the next line im going to write a joke: George W. Bush

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There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

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What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

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A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

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why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

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What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

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is this the krusty krab? no this is smooth lobster.

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Why can't Mich Jackson draw a perfect circle? Because he's dead.

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Q. Why didn't the Atheist enter the church? A. Because Atheists do not go to church so he had no reason to enter.

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

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Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

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How many clowns fit in a car? Depends how many get in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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